2. Well, I got married. I went. I came back. Shocked society.

By Summaiya Noor Ali

I got married on the 13^th of October, came to Sharjah for a month, went back and joined work till 5^th of February. It was an incredible month, where we ate out daily and I held hands with a boy. :O


Not to forget I gained 5 kgs, which has never happened to me in my life of 26 years. 2 of which was divided between my left and right cheek. We went for lovely walks in the cold winter air by the corniche daily, sprinkled with talks of important things and life’s philosophy; what to do in life and how to go about doing it all. Talks of families and sisters, of cousins and friends. We had 10 days to live then hubby would get too busy with work. So we made the most of it. It was so lovely all of it. Like as if we were in a fairy tale and glitter was falling on us the whole time. It went by fast, feels like a dream now. I felt beautiful. Life felt beautiful. It was so darn beautiful. And did I mention how beautiful it all was?

It was decided beforehand that I had a few things that I will come back to in Karachi. My other home. A month after the marriage. My husband knew it, my family loved it. The society disapproved. *drum rolls*

I went back to Karachi. The society that forces people to give jahez; makes my blood boil. I was glad to have this chance, since I imagined that this sort of connection, these gatherings, the feeling of being close to Allah will not be so easily available anywhere else in the world. Also, I was used to these gatherings, and knew what happened, basically I was comfortable with this. So the gatherings continued, after the main days people started keeping gatherings at their houses. It was beautiful, attending with an understanding that this is unique, and I am blessed to have been given this bonus time.

And then comes the balloon deflator. After the event was over, people would ask me, “so you are still here.” “So, for how long.” “Since when are you here.” Such questions would blow my top. I would launch into my debate: “I have lived here 26 years. This is my home too. That is my home too. I don’t know why people are asking me why I am still here. How can anyone just pack up and live somewhere else forever, with someone else forever. It takes time. It has to be a normal process, let the mind body accept it etc etc.” I don’t know how people just pack up and leave like that is what they were born to do. Well, as you can see, since I couldn’t make time to mentally prepare myself, the world was getting to know about it when I came back. I would say all this to people who had time, even to those who did not, everyone was forced to listen to my mantra those days. (I actually have a recording of this as well, since I sent this on Whatsapp to all my relatives as well)

My standard reply:

“Ab mere do ghar hain. Ab mei jab chahoon jahan chahoon jitna chahoon rahoongi.”

“Now I have two houses. Now I will stay whenever I want, wherever I want, for as long as I want.”

This was hilarious. I would say this to strangers and relatives alike. There just had to be a comment from someone and I would launch into my impromptu speech. When I would leave the conversation and physically move on, my mother would take over, trying to smooth ruffled feathers. She would say, “oh you know how she is. Actually, she is not wrong, instead of saying how nice to see you, people are asking her you are still here. There is a way to say things na aunty. I hope you didn’t mind that.” And bla blu bleh blah she would continue.

Also! There was this group of people, and there was another. Two groups that were inserting drama into my life so that I never get bored. I love Allah swt for doing this always. Actually, he knows how easily I get bored and so…

The other group! They would come up to me and say, “Hey! Bride! How are you! Settling well? So when are you planning on having babies? How is your husband? How is he living without you? What do you do there all day? Do you cook? Who cleans? What time does he come from work? So what do you do all day? What do you cook? Do you know how to cook? Did your mom teach you anything? How many times do you eat out in a month?" Everyday. Since it was my honeymoon period, and he made sure I do not do any work during that time. That should have shut them up but no. Oh people please do not worry, he made sure to have home cooked meals delivered to our house because I am in experimental mode right now. Trying out dishes. Oh really? You don’t cook? You should have learned before. This group was more annoying. It was like the more people knew me, they would become terrible to handle. They would know exactly what to say to ruffle my feathers. So much so that I would be left speechless. No standard replies, no shocked expressions. That went by too. I lived, in fact came out stronger.

Anyway, I stayed in my home country for another few months. Then I bought the ticket, and this time I did not buy a return ticket. Then I left and came to my other country where we talked about going to a third country. Hilarious. My life.